Lies

There are at least two kinds of lies that we often believe. Both wreak havoc on our spiritual and emotional lives. Lies about God. Lies about ourselves.

In Nehemiah 6, Sanballat sent an unsealed letter to Nehemiah that contained lies meant to intimidate Nehemiah, to distract him from his calling, to discourage him in the task God had sent him to do. They were lies about Nehemiah--much like the lies about ourselves the enemy whispers in our ears. Lies like, “I can never be good enough for God,” “There is something different about me, something wrong with me… I just don’t fit in, so I might as well stop trying.” Or how about this one, “I really don’t have anything of value to offer the body of Christ or anyone else. What makes me think I can serve God?” Or, “I’ve just failed too many times, I am in no position to minister to anyone else.”

In Genesis 3, the lies of the serpent were about God—meant to put doubt in Eve’s mind about who God was and what His plans were for her life. Also much like the lies Satan whispers to us about who God is and how He feels about each one of us... “He doesn’t hear my prayers, or if He does, He’s choosing not to answer them.” “He really doesn’t want what’s best for me.” Or “He doesn’t love me as much as He loves Miss Susie Perfect-Christian-Mom/Wife-with-the-perfect-family-who-seems-to-have-it-all-together! Why would He love me as much as her since I’m a failure anyway?!”

Wow, I’m going to stop right there, because I can feel the effects of those lies even as I type them. I know they’re not true, but unless I make a conscious effort to find the truth and believe it, repeating it over and over to myself, those lies have a profound effect on my mental, emotional, spiritual and physical state. They are debilitating lies that keep us from accomplishing the things God sent us to do. They keep us from loving one another effectively. Instead, we get caught up in self-protective, defensive, reactions. We become self-absorbed, ruminating on what’s wrong with me, what’s wrong with God, and what’s wrong with everybody else! We become consumed with jealousy, envy and self-pity. We isolate ourselves because, frankly, relationships are just too difficult, messy and painful. Please tell me it’s not just me!

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to live that way! But in order not to live that way, I have to make a conscious effort to think differently… to learn the truth about God… to learn the truth about me… then meditate and ruminate on the truth instead of the lies. Kick the lies to the curb by telling yourself the truth!

There is a huge difference in the outcomes of the stories of Eve and Nehemiah… Eve believed the lies, bringing sin into the world resulting in eternal consequences for all mankind. Nehemiah saw through the lies. He was secure in his calling and pressed on despite them.

 

What is the truth? I was once a sinner, but the price has been paid! I still struggle with sin, but I have been redeemed. Christ’s sacrifice was enough! I can’t out-sin God’s love. Life is tough, but that’s no surprise to God. He told us it would be. So far I have not been boiled in oil, sawn in two or crucified. That’s what the early Christians faced, but they continued to keep the faith.

My life is actually pretty cushy. I have been very blessed. When I begin to count those blessings, I realize how much God loves me and cares for me and the lies are exposed for what they are… attempts to discourage me, distract me, and deflate me.

Lord, I want to know you! I want my faith to be deep enough and strong enough to withstand whatever may come my way. I need a deeper knowledge of You. I need a deeper knowledge of Your truth. Thank You for Your faithfulness to me. Help me to always be faithful to You. Amen.

A Heart that can Break

As I continue in the study of Nehemiah, I am seeking the "LORD, God of heaven, the great and awesome God, who keeps his covenant of love with those who love him and obey his commands", (Nehemiah 1:5) I am working to muster the courage to pray the prayer I know God is calling me to pray.

I have wept, fasted and prayed and grieved so much for my children--all three of them--I want to be done. But God is not done. Thank God He is not not. He's not done with me, He's not done with my two children who have not yet entered His presence, and He's not done with a great big, hurting, starving, desperate world. There are so many things over which our hearts can break.

So, Lord, here is my prayer... Oh, this is scary, (deep breath) give... (I write with great fear and trembling) me a heart... (here I go)... [pregnant pause] that can... (another deep breath) break. There, I said it. I prayed it. Now Lord, show me where my heart should break and over what. I have one area in mind, but I really do want what you want, Lord.

I end this post expectantly. I've learned from experience that God answers prayers like this one. That's why my knees are knocking.

Providence in Scripture Reading

This weekend I took my chronological Bible to the lake with us to catch up on my reading. I didn’t get a lot done, but I did some. I don’t know about you, but I often have a hard time concentrating and forget what I read the instant I finish. Plus, I often get interrupted—mainly by my 5-year-old.

This morning, back at home, I opened my Bible to the point where my bookmark was. I realized I had read this section already, so I skipped ahead to find an unfamiliar part. I came to Nehemiah 4, and the last few verses spoke to powerfully to me and a situation in my life—especially regarding events of the weekend.

I underlined several phrases and wrote in the margin. Then I turned the page and realized that I actually had read all of it while at the lake! Where I had actually left off was two pages beyond my bookmark! Had I forgotten to move my bookmark? I never have before. Had my 5-year-old moved it? Possibly, but I never saw her anywhere near my Bible. All I know is that I was meant to read Nehemiah 4 today…

“When our enemies heard that we were aware of their plot and that God had frustrated it, we all returned to the wall, each to his own work.” Nehemiah 4:15 (NIV)

I am often distracted by the enemy’s plots. I get so wrapped up in my own stuff—my grief and worry. I get caught up in discouragement and despair, and that keeps me from accomplishing what I truly believe God has called me to do. I feel unworthy and incapable. Who am I to think that I could serve God or speak to anyone else about Him? But if I would just listen and seek God, instead of focusing on my worries, fears and insecurities, maybe I, too, would be more aware of the enemy’s plot. Just maybe I could see how God was frustrating that plot!

“Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other, and each of the builders wore his sword at his side as he worked. But the man who sounded the trumpet stayed with me.” Nehemiah 4:17-18 (NIV)

Ruth Bell Graham wrote a poem that has helped carry me through times of terrible worry and stress. If you’re a mom, you understand—especially if you’re a mom of an adult child who has struggles. I want so much for my child. I want things that he doesn’t necessarily want for himself. But part of me feels like I must convince him to want these things! I have to make him understand. Graham’s poem addresses this problem we mothers have. She talks about how she prays all day long as she goes about her work, and she spends time on her knees in prayer at night. But she also realizes that there is a work that needs to be done in her child that only God can do! She ends by saying, “God is God and there is work to do.”  So instead of wearing myself out worrying and strategizing for my child, I will pray, put my child safely in the hands of God, and then I will go on with my work that I feel God calling me to do. I will do my work with one hand and in the other I will carry a weapon—the word of God--that I continue to pray over my child. But I will not stop moving forward. I will not be paralyzed by fear and worry!

“Whenever you hear the sound of the trumpet, join us there. Our God will fight for us!” Nehemiah 4:20 (NIV)

Instead of wasting my prayer time trying to convince God to do things my way, I will trust His way. Instead of trying to change His mind about my situation, I will listen for that trumpet. And when I hear it, I will rush to join God in the work that He is doing. He will fight FOR me!

Thank you, Lord, for not allowing me to skim over this portion of scripture that I’ve read so many times. However that bookmark got placed two pages back doesn’t matter. What does matter is that You will go to great lengths to speak to me. I just have to listen!